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DO IT YOURSELF: "You don't have to be a rocket scientist" to build a cruise missile, says Bruce Simpson, 49, of New Zealand. Simpson, who lives near Auckland, has said anyone could make one for US$5,000, and is proving it by doing it himself in his garage. He has already tested the jet engine, and says all the needed parts can be bought on the open market. "All this stuff is off the shelf," he says. "It came in under the radar" of customs authorities who, he says, allowed the shipment of the parts from overseas. (NZ Press Association) ...That's nothing. Some countries have figured out how to get scores of them delivered for free.
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SUPER-SIZE IT FOR JUST 39 CENTS MORE: An unidentified couple has been sentenced to a year of probation and fined $328 each after being arrested in a Hardee's restaurant in New Philadelphia, Ohio. Convicted of public indecency for having sex in a booth in the eating area, the man, 70, and the woman, 60, are married -- but not to each other. Municipal Court Judge Mary Wade Space asked the couple why they would have sex in the burger joint in front of other patrons and employees. "I don't have any answer for that," the man answered. "I don't either," the woman echoed. (New Philadelphia Times-Reporter) ...It's the restaurant's fault for their slogan, "Never Let a Hardee Go To Waste".
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I CAN'T PUT MY FINGER ON IT: Police say a man tried to rob a pharmacy in Neillsville, Wisc., using the time-honored ruse of pretending his finger was a gun. Except the man, wearing a mask, didn't feel the need to hide the fake gun in his pocket -- he held his finger up to pharmacist Bill Weiler. "I kind of chuckled," Weiler said, asking "This is a robbery?" The man then "pushed me and said, 'Yeah, this is a robbery'." He wrestled with the man and, in the scuffle, pulled off his mask. He recognized the robber as Joel D. Peterson, 30, who had earlier allegedly tried to fill forged prescriptions. (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel) ...Which Weiler knew were forged because there's no such thing as "Smart Pills".
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"M" DISAVOWS ANY KNOWLEDGE OF HIS ACTIONS: Rawson Watson, 37, of Kent, England, had "a cunning James Bond adventure" plan to steal 225 million Spanish pesetas (US$2.5 million) from the cargo hold of a British Airways jet, prosecutors say. Watson was smuggled onto the plane in a cargo container in London for a flight to Madrid. On the return flight, they say, he broke into a currency vault in the cargo hold, took the cash, and returned to his hiding place. The scheme was discovered when cargo handlers at Heathrow airport removed the container holding Watson -- and dropped it. "The lid of the box fell off and a man fell out," said prosecutor Christopher Hehir. "The loaders were absolutely flabbergasted. One thought it was a dead body." But he didn't think that for long since Watson jumped up, told them "Don't worry about me, I'll be all right," and ran off -- without the money. (London Guardian) ...If it were a James Bond plan, "Q" would have anticipated that and given him the right device to escape -- with the money.
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AFTER 49 STATES REJECT ITS APPLICATION: "Miami Considers Staying Put" -- New York Times headline
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THIS WEEK'S HONORARY UNSUBSCRIBE goes to Dean Dunlavey. An attorney, Dunlavey is best known for arguing "Sony Corp. of America vs. Universal City Studios" all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court. At issue in the so-called "Betamax Case" was whether consumers had the right to use the then-new video cassette recorders to tape television shows for their own use. The case started in 1979 with Hollywood studios complaining that their copyrights were being violated, and that Sony and other VCR manufacturers were responsible as "contributory infringers". After going back and forth several times, the case was heard by the Supreme Court in 1984. "The studios have been paid once. There's no reason they should be paid twice," Dunlavey argued. Thanks to his win, Americans are free to tape shows to watch later -- "time-shifting", as it became known, and now use even more convenient hard-disk-based Personal Video Recorders. He died June 28 in southern California after a fall at age 77.
(This week's runner-up: Singer Barry White, best known for his deep-voiced "Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Babe" (1974), dead July 3, 2003 from kidney failure at 58.)
